J and I are being double-y difficult when it comes to sharing information about Muppet. I already wrote about how we’re team green, so no one knows whether Muppet is a boy or a girl. To be fair, we don’t know either, so it’s not like we’re hiding the ball on that one. But we’re also not sharing information we do know – Muppet’s future name.
We have it all picked out – 2 for a girl and 2 for a boy. Mostly because of my best friends is due in July and not sharing her names either. I wanted to have a backup just in case. For some people it’s no big deal to have your kid have the same name as a friend’s kid. But personally, I don’t love it, and there are so many other names out there I’d prefer to choose something different.
We’re VERY picky with names too. It’s not just friends’ childrens’ names that are off-limits, we’ve also vetoed names of friends, and names of family members. As someone with two cousins that share a first name, I get annoyed having to qualify whether I mean Sam X or Sam Y when talking to family members.
So why aren’t we sharing Muppet’s name? One reason – we don’t really want opinions. No “Well have you thought of this name instead?” or “How come you don’t want to use your great-aunt Murgatroyd’s name?” or “Really? You want to name your baby THAT?” And it happens. Naming is one of those fun perks of being a parent. Or a pet owner. Or having a doll. And everyone wants a piece. And everyone has an opinion that is quite obviously better than yours. But once it’s done, it’s done. And no one wants to tell you that Fergus is an awful name once you introduce the adorable pink bundle with blinky eyes and wee little yawn.
So instead, we spend our time coming up with REALLY awful names to share with people when pressed. And I’ll start including some of our picks of the week in my weekly update.
I know people judge baby names, because I’m as guilty of judging as the next person. I have friends who have fabulous baby names. Some of my faves. And I have other friends who have named their children names that raise eyebrows when I talk about them behind their backs. And yes, I do talk about them behind their backs (how could they name their child that? Don’t they want their children to be successful? Do they want their children to be beat up on the playground? –although, to be fair, my favorite boy names are the really nerdy sounding ones that make me picture little boys in glasses getting wedgies during recess.)
For instance, recently at work I was reading the records of a man (I’ll let you guess his name to protect his identity). He has two sons. One is named James, and the other is named Jaymes. (and you thought I was picky about having cousins with the same name!) You’ll never guess what I brought up at the dinner table that night. That’s my point. People talk. People you know, and people you don’t know. (Please see above where I wrote that everyone has an opinion that is quite obviously better than yours) I’ll introduce you to some of the things that we thought about when choosing Muppet’s name.
Initials – I’ll never forget being in elementary school when my best friend’s older brother decided to change his name. According to him, he went from his middle name to his first name – although no one believed him. We all thought he went from his first name to his middle name, because we’d never heard of anyone originally being called by his middle name. My best friend (who probably knew) told me we were being ridiculous. If we were correct, his parents would have given his brother the initials A-S-S, and no parents would be that cruel to a child. While not quite as drastic, J and I made sure to rule out any initials that would give our son or daughter any difficulty. Unfortunately, that ruled out an entire letter for first names, but it’s a sacrifice we think our future children will thank us for.
Rhyming – Our last name is two syllables and ends with an –er. I have a tendency to love two syllable first names ending with an –er. Except, put the two together and it sounds like a nursery rhyme. Or like tripping up stairs.
Alliteration – Similarly, we ruled out another letter for first names, the letter that begins our last name. Because to me, having a first and last name starting with the same letter makes you sound like a cartoon character (see Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Bugs Bunny) or a comic book character (see Peter Parker, Lois Lane).
Made up Names – These are some of my FAVORITES because I always picture the parents sitting around saying “Hmmmmmm there are millions of names out there, but I don’t like a single one of them! I’m going to make up my own to show how smart and creative I am.” Problem is, it rarely makes you look smart or creative. Usually it has the opposite effect. The two most common ways to make up a name are to take a name that exists and change the first letter (I’m looking at you Zaiden) or to combine two names by smooshing them together in an almost inhumane way (Charmony).
Made up Spellings – I love these almost as much as made up names. This is where you take a perfectly good name and decide to butcher the spelling to make it more “unique” or “creative.” Again, like the made up names, it rarely has the effect of making you look smart or creative. (See Jaymes above) I have a friend who named her daughter Alice. Which is a fabulous name. She had to seriously battle with her husband who wanted to spell it Alyss. But that was back during the time of the “y” when those things were stuck in any which way into any name – whether it needed a y or not. I’ve noticed the trend has moved to “x” and you’ll start seeing more names like Jaxon floating around. Usually (but not always) you’ll see these misspelling associated with really common names – as though the parents are trying to say “See, I knew there would be 70 Olivias in her class, so I wanted to set her apart by naming her Oilyveah.” But when you’re screaming across the playground for little Oilyveah to stop kicking little Xristoffer in the head, the other 69 Olivias and their parents aren’t going to realize your precious pumpkin has a different spelling (all sound same). Likewise, what lesson are you teaching your child? That conventional spelling doesn’t apply? If you don’t like the way something is spelled, change it! I see that going over REALLY well during the elementary school days of spelling tests and spelling bees.
Total weight gain/loss: +9
Next Appointment: Monday July 18
Maternity clothes? Usually I tend to wear maternity clothes more on the weekend, but this weekend we were packing and so I was barely wearing clothes at all - just the Target long and lean tanks (non-maternity). I don't think I've worn any maternity clothes this week, but I'm noticing I might be getting too big for my fabulous bella band.
Stretch marks: nada.
Sleep: I've pretty much decided that I'll never sleep through the night again. Whether it's getting up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, waking up in the middle of the night from being too hot, or waking up in the middle of the night because I'm getting kicked. And I don't anticipate that changing any time in the future.
Best moment this week: I don't think anything really stands out!
Movement: Constantly. And Muppet has found my ribs which is pretty freaking uncomfortable.
Food cravings: Nothing
Food aversions: Nothing
Gender: Tell you in October!
Belly Button in or out: in. The general consensus has determined that it probably isn't going to pop - just stretch out.
What I miss: The hot tub! When I'm at the gym sometimes I'll just stare at it like Homer Simpson stares at a jelly doughnut.
What I am looking forward to: Being able to sit comfortably.
Contractions: Nope.
Milestones:
- Hair Hair Everywhere! Muppet has eyebrows, eyelashes, and is starting to grow head hair!
Baby Names:
Boy: Elmo Bradley
Girl: Elmo Bradley (please someone help me convince my husband that Bradley is not an appropriate middle name for a girl)
And it's time again for the photo college. It's crazy to think my stomach used to curve more inward than outward!
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